BIRTH OF LOVE AND HATRED

    Human brain is even more complex than a computer hard disk. Each person has different behaviour pattern, attributes, virtues and qualities. What a person thinks can never be imagined or known to other person. A personality has both negative and positive side and it affects the others in the society and even helps a person to grow negative or positive in life. I can say that love and hatred are offshoot of a person's behaviour. It is thus said" love begets love" and "hatred begets hatred". It means is that in order to be loved, you must be willing to love. It's similar to love is a two-way street"; you can't expect to be loved if you won't love that person in return. I will discuss a few incidents of my life which had strong impact on my life.

   When I was a small boy of six or seven year old, once one of my uncle brought a packet of biscuit and he wanted to give a few biscuits to me. He called me but suddenly my aunt appeared, snatched the packet from the hands of my uncle and went inside the home. I could not move ahead and came back to my mother.  This had a very serious impact on my thinking towards my aunt. I always kept myself away from my uncle's family. During one of my visit to Andaman, I had gone to another Island and on return from there, the bus had to pass through the village where my uncle's family reside. The bus use to stop for about ten fifteen minutes. Someone told my aunt that I am in the bus and she came and asked me to step down from the bus. She took me home and treated me nicely. But inspite of this, the past incident haunted me again and again. On the next day I came my home gave a serious thought to the changed behaviour of my aunt. I thought and thought for many years and I decided to forgive her past behaviour.

    During our middle school days, we never use to take tiff-en to school and during lunch break we will eat only the snacks given by the school. Often we will come out of school campus for a sort walk. There were Forest and PWD camps close to school and quite often someone may feed us whatsoever was available with them.  This acts of people had too strong impact and taught me to generous towards another person.

    Yet, there is one memory in my mind of a person. He had come to Andaman from Orissa and my parents gave him shelter at our home. My mother and his title was same so we use to call him "Mamaji" or "Mamu". When he had come, he had no money and no clothes to wear. He had reached our home hungry and thirsty. Over a period of time, he got a regular job in Agriculture Department and got a posting in Port Blair where I was studying.  Whenever, he will meet me, he will take out a Rs.10/- note and put it in my pocket. In December 1982, I got a job too. When I met him once he did the same thing which he was doing earlier. He put a Rs.10/- note in my pocket.  I resisted and told him that now I am employed. His behaviour and reply was great. He said, " So what if your employed. You are still child for me."

    These incidents taught me to forgive others, love others and share with others with a generous heart.

    

A TRIBUTE TO MY FATHER

     

On 8 th July, 2012, my mother Carmela Tirkey went heavenly abroad. We had her last rite on 22 nd April, 2013 an soon after two months my father Shri Nicholas Barla followed her to heaven on 9.20 A.M. on 10th July, 2013. As I was informed he had some toothache during the preceding week and administered some pain killers. But all of a sudden on 7th July, he left eating any thing. Initially he was reluctant to go the hospital but on 7.7.2013 he was taken to local medical and on the next day he was referred to G.B.Pant Hospital, Port Blair. Perhaps time had come and he left this world silently and peacefully. He was physically fit but he had suffered for about more than 40 years of leg pain.

My parents are no different than any other parents. But I have special regards for both of them not because they cared us as but both of them sacrificed much for their parents, brothers, their families and for all their relatives too. My mother tells that they were very poor in Jharkhand. We had only small piece of land which was not sufficient for four brothers. My father had to work as a servant to a businessman. He also worked for sometime as daily wager in Ranchi. When he went Andaman in 1954 as a Forest Labourer, he was hardly 19-20 years old. He left behind my mother, my elder brother and sister IN Jharkhand. My brother and sister were hardly 2-3 years old at that time.

In 1959, when people were being asked to settle in Andaman permanently under colonisation scheme, my father too opted for it. Over a period of 2-4 years, he took his parents, my mother, my elder brother, sister, his third and fourth brother. Only my Second uncle was left behind in Jharkhand. My father helped both of his third and fourth brothers to settle them in Andaman, got them married. Not only this, my parents helped my maternal uncle also to settle down in Andaman.I remember, my parents gave shelter in our home to a lot many people from Jharkhand who were new in Andaman. When my second Uncle died in 1976 in Jharkhand, he came Jharkhand in 1977 to settle many issues at our ancestral village. He remained here for about a year leaving his own family at Baratang at the hands of my mother. I recall, he came back some time in April/May 1978 when my result of matriculation was about to come. Prior to this he had brought his elder sister's step son to Andaman so that he is also settles down there. This time in 1978, he brought with him, grandson of my grandmother's sister. When my mother had visited Jharkhand in 1983, she brought with her, her sister's son who still live with our family. There are many such other persons who were not related to us but found shelter at our home.

I was first to born in Andaman. So, I have seen the hardship we and my parents faced in Andaman. Inspite of this, they struggled and educated all of us. My three Uncles are no more but at least their families have a settled life, wherever, they are.

The best and biggest quality of my father was that he was hard working and very generous. I remember that once he purchased a Buffalo for ploughing our field in another Island namely Kadamtala and was coming home. On the way, in Adajig village, my Uncle was residing and he requested that the Buffalo be given to him. Though we were in dire need of that Buffalo, he gladly handed over that to his brother. If anyone asked anything from him, he will give it to him or her without thinking anything. He visited Delhi in 2003. He first went to Jharkhand and my cousin and maternal cousin accompanied him to Delhi. When he came Delhi, he told me he has no money. I gave him money so that he could go back to Andaman. At his own expenses, he took my aunt from Jharkhand for a visit. When he landed at Port Blair I asked him about the journey but he first told me he had no money because he had spent all money out of his generosity.

Since last two years, I often speak to him over phone and ask him about his health. Every time he will say, " We have seen the life and lived it to its fullness so don't worry." Last time in April this year he repeated the same words. I was in Andaman during April 19-28, 2013 for last rite of my mother. I was with him for five days. He was hale and hearty. I noted, he tried to spend maximum time with me. He took me to the Plantation area to show me how had utilised the money I gave him. Even though I was not very well, at his request, I went along with him to the plantation site. Before I left home on 25th April, 2013, he had told others at home to put some spices from our own plantation in my bag.

In my own way I think, he had a satisfied life in this world. We are six brother and one sister. Sister is married to the step son of my father's elder sister itself. Elder brother retired as Postmaster. I am working here in Delhi. Third one is working in Forest Department and fourth one as Teacher. The fifth one looks after the affairs of home and sixth one is a Catholic Priest. My elder brother's elder daughter has two sons and the second one is a Nun in Sisters of Charity of St. Anne.(While I was writing this my father's funeral was over(12.15 p.m. 11.07.2013.)

It is just a chance or coincidence that last year on 8th July my mother expired and this year same month my father too left. Both of them left this world silently and peacefully and in a way they had Holy Death. On my own account, I am grateful and thankful to God for my parents. They did every thing to see me well off. I knew, they were happy with my achievements in life. The only thing which troubles me is that at the last hours, I was not physically present with them but it was all God' will and plan. Thank you Lord for my parents and keep them on your lap. Forgive their worldly sins, allow them to enter into heaven to see the Glory of God.