Tribute to my Mother

         My mother, Carmela Tirkey left for heavenly abode on 8th July, 2012. She had a long struggle of life, and long journey. She had seen the difficulties of life in her childhood. I had two brother and sister elder to me born in Simdega, Jharkand. In 1960 my father who was already working in Forest Department of Andaman and Nicobar islands decided to finally settle down at Baratang Islands. It was the year 1961 I was born in Kanchan Garh Village of Baratang Islands. My father had brought with him his two brothers and his parents.My parents not only looked after my Grandparents but they helped his two brothers to settle down in Andamans. The population of Baratang in 1960 might have been just five hundred. At home I was alone with my parents and my elder sister. My elder brother was put to a school in Port Blair. We were just in the midst of jungle. Basically we are tribal from Jharkhand so we took the life easy.My mother had seen the life of poorness and she will always tell us to use the food, money and whatsoever we had to the optimum. After some time my elder sister too left for her  higher studies to some other Islands. My grand mother expired in late sixties and my grandfather too expired in 1974.  I remained with my parents till June 1976 and thereafter I was out for my further schooling and higher studies at Port Blair. When I was with her, she taught me how to cook food, serve and taught me every small  house hold job which normally a Girl child is required to do. I often use to get annoyed but she never listened to me. Since we belong to peasant family, there were many works at home to attend right from early morning to night. And in the meantime, we had to find time for home works and studies. The life was really difficult one. I was the only young boy and had to share the workload of my parents. I was always scolded and often I use to loose my heart. In later part of my life, I could understand that she never dealt with in a similar fashion with my younger brothers. When I left home for higher studies in 1976, I faced many difficulties but the things she taught me in my childhood worked well in my  future life. I was able to cook food for myself and do many other things for myself. Today I consider myself independent and self-made man and can face anything which may come in my way.

        She was respectful and loving to all our relatives. It didnot matter to her how distantly she or he was related. If someone use to come from Jharkhand or after a visit to Jarkhand she will inquire about everyone she knew. She will also tell us who are our relatives?, where  they live? and how they are related to us. Sometime chain was very long and often I use to get confused. I recall once in 1988, she told me about someone and asked me to locate him. In fact that person was his distantly related nephew and was a Priest. I harshly replied her that it was difficult for me to find him out in a big country like India. Tears came out of her eyes. I didnot say anything to her at that point of time but kept her desire in my mind. Some four years later, I found out that relative in Delhi. It was due to her this nature that many new comers from Jharkhand found a shelter in our home at Baratang and subsequently they settled well in their life in Andaman.After coming to Delhi in 1985, I am now a frequent visitor of Jharkhand too. I could locate many of our relatives in Jharkhand to whom I had never seen or met. Wherever and whenever I visited a few of them in Jharkhand, the entire village will turn up to see me because I am her son.

    In 1976, my second uncle died in Jharkhand. He was the lone Uncle in Jharkhand to look after whatsoever ancestral property we had. My father had to go to Jharkhand to settle many things there in 1977. My father remained in Jharkhand for one year and this time was really tough for her. She started selling vegetables and other products of home in the Bazar. This became a habit and routine  for rest of her life. She will take vegetables in a tokri and bring household items.

       She was a religious woman too. She will always ask us to say evening prayers. Even if we were tired of whole days' work, she will insist for a small evening prayer. She was blessed with two priests( my younger brother and cousin) and one nun before she left this world.

       In 1985 I finally left Andaman and came Delhi and meeting with my parents became rarest incidence of my life. In my childhood I always felt neglected but in practical terms it was not. Both my parents loved me and whenever they needed anything they will solely depend on me. Once I asked my mother why does she ask me alone for everything,  when she has another five sons? She humbly told me, " Beta you are the only one who can afford to help us". and I was mum.Whenever, I use to visit them, she will hold my hands. In 2009 I had to pull my hands with force before I left but when I visited her in October 2011, she was soft just shook hands and said bye with pain in her heart which I easily took note of.I had decided to visit them in December, 2012 to have a Christmas Celebrations with them but unfortunately it remained a dream of my life.

     I always regret of not fulfilling my parents desire to become a Priest. In fact I was to join a minor seminary in 1976 but I could not get a ticket for journey to Calcutta.And in the meantime, my Uncle too died in Jharkhand. In due course of time my desire to become priest too died  down. I felt God's plan was something else for me and I calmly tried to settle down in my life according to his plan.

      My mother has left us living his wordily life to the full and this gives me satisfaction.  The only thing I regret is that I was not with her when she left this world. My brothers kept me informed of every details till she died. It was early in the morning (7.00 A.M. on 8th July, 2012), when my youngest priest brother was preparing to offer a Mass at home. She drank a few drops of water from the hand of my elder brother and it was over. Many told me that it is rare that she died when everyone from the family(except me, family, nephew and my niece ) was around her praying for her.  But I hope and pray she must me enjoying the company of LORD JESUS in heaven.

My Parents

My parents are no different than any other parents. But I have special regards for both of them not because they cared us as but both of them sacrificed much for their parents, brothers, their families and for all their relatives too. My mother tells that they were very poor in jharkhand. We had only small piece of land which was not sufficient for four brothers. My father had to work as a servant to a businessman. He also worked for sometime as daily wager in Ranchi. When he went Andamans in 1954 as a Forest Labourer, he was hardly 19-20 years old. He left behind my mother, my elder brother and sister. My brother and sister were hardly 2-3 years old at that time.



     In 1959, when people were being asked to settle in Andamans permanently under colonisation scheme, my father too opted for it. Over a period of 2-4 years, he took his parents, my mother, my elder brother, sister,  his third and fourth brother. Only my Second uncle was left behind in Jharkhand. My father helped both of his third and fourth brothers to settle them in Andamans, got them married. I remeber, my parents gave shelter in our home to a lot many people from Jharkhand who were new in Andamans.

    I was first to born in Andaman. So, I have seen the hardship we and my parents faced in Andaman.  We were six brothers and one sister. I had  one elder brother and one elder sister. We had enough grains to eat but there was always scarcity of money. My both sister and brother were studying in different Islands so my parents needed money for their studies.  Often I had to sell vegetables, rice or milk etc so that we get money to  buy things needed for home.  In 1976 I went Port Blair to study further after my middle School. In fact before that my parents had planned that I become a Priest but it was God's will, I didnot get ticket to travel by the ship and had to stay back and to join Nirmala School. Two years passed well but when I joined 11th class there was serious cash crunch at  home. So till  harvest season was over, I had to live a rented house at Port Blair for six months because they had no enough money to meet my expenses of the hostel. Inspite of this, they struggled and educated all of us. My three Uncles are no more but at least their families have a settled life, wherever, they are. My father was a hard working and generous man whereas my mother was simple but strict disciplinarian. She was hard-working too and was deadly against wastage of food or any thing available in family. 

     In the year 1982, I was offered a seat of MBA at Coimbatore.  I asked permission of my parents. I knew they didnot have much money but they agreed. Unfortunately due to some deficiency in my degree, the University sent me back and continued with my M.A. studies. In December, 1982 I got a job of Lower Grade Clerk and got posting in the College itself. I sent Rs.150/- to my father from my first salary. He was so happy that he enjoyed as much as he could and gave Rs. 50/- to my mother. Someone told him that " अब तो आपका बेटा बाबु बन गया है. My father replied him,    हां, कम से कम हेड क्लर्क तो रिटायर होगा.  I still remember those words of my father.

    In 1985, I joined CSS in Delhi and thereafter, my visit to my parents was very rare but they continued their hard work and for money they always depended on me.  The money I gave them were utilised for the good of entire family. Today we have pucca semi built house. A big area of coconut, banana, beetle nut and spices plantation. They were happy with my achievements and this was always visible on their faces. 

No. 13

   I find people are always allergic to No. 13. No one, specially in North India likes No. 13 and generally it is avoided for start of any work on this date. On 18th of March, it was birthday of my niece Neel Prabha who is in Kanyakumari and is about to become a nun in Missionary Society of St. Anne of Charity. She told me that she will take her first vow on 13th May, 2012 at Kanya Kumari. May be it is incidental but on 13th May, 2001 my youngest brother was ordained as Priest for Port Blair Diocese and my niece will too become a Nun on 13th May. I just feel and believe that all things are made by God for good of human beings and may be that 13th may be good day for my family too.